Introducing Elsa - The Ice Queen

 This post is coming a bit later than I had planned, but so is life with a toddler, work, buying/selling a house, etc. (Sorry, kid - already getting the second child treatment.)

I won't bury the lead any longer - we're pregnant with #2! It's been a wild ride but we are so happy to have the opportunity to expand our family again. We are so very lucky. 

Backing up - I want to make sure I document this transfer process because it was very different from Wyatt's - goes to show every baby / embryo is different! Must remember this when I do the comparison game once the baby gets here... 

We decided last year (around this time) that fall 2023 would be a good time to jump back into the IVF pool again. I could have my best hot/feral-mom-summer and then get back to business. While most (fertile) people can just say, 'oh what the hay! let's give it a go!' and throw caution and birth control to the wind, our family planning requires a bit more than that. Because it had been over a year since my last diagnostic testing, CCRM wanted me to come back to re-do most of it. This meant a June trip out to Denver - which was really a disaster, tbh. Spending time with our friends and family was great - the many logistical problems (travel, mom-brain and otherwise) + getting hand foot and mouth was not the coolest! But all my tests came back normal so it was a purposeful if not stressful trip. 

Wyatt + TiTi Kath having a ball

Then it was back home and I lived my best life for the rest of the summer - culminating in a great family trip to Oregon wine country in which I drank enough wine to last me for 9 months. Then it was back to no caffeine, no booze, no fun... lol. I was ready and knew what to expect, but that's what's funny about trying to make a baby... you can't really plan for anything.

I started my medications in August - brought them along to our last big hurrah - a Mom & Dad trip to Montreal. Which was amazing and highly highly recommend both the city and a trip with your partner before you jump into all of this again. I felt fine and went in for my first hormone check surprised to see that my estrogen levels were much, much lower than they had been with Wyatt. Conversely, my endometrial lining was better. It just felt like a big 'huh?' Like what could've changed? But I having had a baby means my body is different than before - no ifs ands or buts about that... well maybe a butt... 

My testing continued along in this fashion in which my hormones were just kind of all over the place - sometimes they'd go up and sometimes they'd go down. They increased my meds and that seemed to help. This was of course stressful, but the biggest stress was trying to find a god damn place to get my hormones checked at all. 

Because we've decided to go to a clinic out of state, I've had to arrange for "outside monitoring" at a clinic in Chicago. One that would be willing to take me as an "outside patient" (even though I'd pay out of pocket), and willing to send my test results same-day to CCRM. Last time, I went to FCI. And this was very straight forward and easy. Never had a problem. This time... FCI told me at my first appointment they wouldn't see me any longer because CCRM endorsed a clinic in the suburbs. Petty bullshit. So I had to find a new place to run my labs. These blood tests are not difficult, they aren't abnormal or out of the ordinary either. But man... nobody wanted to see me. 

But back to this lil' embaby for a sec. We had our transfer on Sept 21. We left Wyatt with his TiTi Clare (with help from his Auntie Arden too) to go meet Wyatt's sibling. We were excited and nervous but surprisingly calm. This would be a cherry on top. Life was already really sweet... we hoped it would work, but we felt less pressure to make it so.

Transfer went smoothly. We saw the embryo all blown up and again - I was in awe. How this little speck of dust could potentially be a living, breathing baby will never cease to amaze me. Doctor had a little bit of trouble getting around a tight part of my cervix, but found a good spot to aim and whoosh! The embryo shot through the catheter and into my uterus. 

Voila! Our beautiful embaby

Ready to get pregnant

They tell you to be on 'modified bedrest' for the remainder of the day which I was happy to oblige with. I got all set in our big comfy hotel bed to watch some relaxing murder shows when we got a call from Wyatt's daycare that he needed to be picked up with suspected pinkeye. Of couuuurrrrseeee. What is rest and relaxation when you have a child? Truly will not exist in the same way it did before Wyatt. Wouldn't change it for the world, though!

TiTi Clare for the win! Do not know what we'd do without her. She's a special person. 

TiTi Clare <3

After debating if Evan should fly home, we realized Wyatt was in great hands and went to dinner at Safta - the same place we had dinner after Wyatt's transfer. Ate a ton of pita and hummus and called it a night. 

Evan and Hummus

After coming home, we took it easy. I was debating whether to test early or not. I didn't test early with Wyatt, but this time around I think I was a bit more accepting of either outcome. And then it became an absolute nightmare trying to find a place to go to get a blood pregnancy test - something literally anywhere can do! But no one would take me on the weekend or provide same day results. Once I ran into this hurdle, I was pretty committed to testing early so that I could have some control in this very annoying situation. 

On 6DPT (6 days post transfer) I took an at-home test and it was positive! We were pretty shocked - I had no symptoms given how early it was. Evan and Wyatt are equally stoked as evidenced below. 

Can you tell they're related?

My blood hCG came back much lower (68) than it did with Wyatt (300) too. This isn't necessarily indicative of anything (they just want to see it about 50) but it did worry me. Nothing I could do to impact it either way though. My hormones continued to be wonky and they upped my meds again. 

We waited not so patiently for our first ultrasound and again had a very different experience then with Wyatt. With Wyatt, they asked me if my due date was wrong because he was tracking so far ahead (and ended up being 3 weeks early so maybe this had something to do with it - he was just a little bit more cooked from the beginning!) This lil babe is measuring right on track. We saw the heartbeat and everything looked good at the 6.5 week ultrasound. 

6.5 week ultrasound

Then another 2 weeks went by before our next ultrasound. Last time - this was torture. This time - I was busy. Busy with work, with Wyatt and then - Evan and I decided to put an offer on a house and put ours on the market during these 2 weeks. Thankfully everything looked on track at this ultrasound too - heartbeat strong again. 

8.5 week ultrasound

Now we wait 4 weeks before we see her (!) again. I'm anxious about it. It's hard for me to believe that all the things can go right - we can buy a new house, sell ours and have a baby girl in June - is that all possible?? I'm trying to believe in my body, believe her and I can do this together - and that no matter what - our little family can get through anything that comes our way. 

I'm so excited to watch Wyatt become a big brother. I loved having siblings and I hope he does too. He's very interested in babies so I think that's a good sign. I'm sure it will feel different when that baby never leaves but... it'll be good for him. I'm also very excited to see Evan as a girl dad. He's wanted a girl since we started IVF and as a staunch feminist (ask him), he's going to be really smitten with his gal. 

I've been feeling fine during the 1st trimester - I'm 9.5 weeks now. A bit tired, but who's to blame? I get to start weaning off my medications this weekend - hoorah! That'll be a nice change - even though Wyatt has been very helpful - see below. 

Loved my "stickers" and hype man for my shots

I've said it before and I'll say it again - we are so lucky to get this chance. This time around we have quite a few friends in the depths of infertility and I know how privileged we are to 1) have insurance coverage 2) have genetically normal embryos and 3) it's worked for us twice now. Sending so much love to all of those in the wait and in the work. 

So, a formal introduction to Elsa the Ice Queen - she'll be an amazing addition that I can't wait to meet. All of my fingers and toes crossed that we get a healthy baby in June - and until then, we'll be packing up our house and moving! I'm already so exhausted thinking about it. But I'm also totally looking at cute girl nursery decor... I can't help it :)