We're having a blast(ocyst)

I've prided myself on bringing humor to this experience but I don't really know how to make this post funny. 

We got a call Wednesday at 10:30am which was unexpected - the clinic said they usually call in the afternoon. I was alone as Evan was working on his golf game (working hard or hardly working.........) I answered, already starting to shake as the embryologist said, "We will be sending 10 embryos to genetic testing and have another 5 we'll be freezing." 

15 EMBRYOS!!!!! That's insane! I almost collapsed. Never in our wildest dreams did we think we'd have that many. It really shocked me. I guess our DNA likes each other - they just never had a chance to meet. 

I made her give me the grades for all 10 being sent to genetic testing. Grading of embryos is a qualitative process in which the lab looks at the inner mass where the cells are actively dividing and what will become the bebe and the outer lining which will become the placenta. On Day 3 of division they give it a number (6 being the best) and then Day 5 they give letters to the inner mass and outer lining (A being best, B being good, C being lower quality.) I won't bore you with the grading of ours just yet, but we've got some good graded embryos!

We are so happy. We are so RELIEVED. We are celebrating. 

BUTTTTTTT (you knew it was coming) none of this guarantees anything. We are sending 10 of these embabies to genetic testing. This is where they take a few cells off the embryo (doesn't hurt it, don't worry) and test it's chromosomes to check for abnormalities that can result in birth defects, miscarriage and implantation failure. Some of those birth defects can be things like Down Syndrome or Trisomy 18 which result from extra chromosomes. In someone my age, on average 66% of embryos should be genetically normal. But that isn't always the case. We'll get that news the week of 7/19 so fingers crossed in perpetuity. 

I can't describe the amount of weight that feels like it's lifted off of our shoulders. I feel 10 lbs lighter. Which is probably because I finally took a massive dump (praise the lord!!!!!) but also this good news certainly helps too. 

We know these results are not the norm. We are sensitive to the fact that this is NOT the situation for most people going through IVF. We are so grateful and realize how lucky we are. So just know that because we had good news doesn't mean your other friends who are going through this will too. And yet - it only takes one. Every embryo is a chance so keeping the hope alive is always worth it.

We've got a long way to go. Even the highest graded embryos fail to implant. We're at the top of what has felt like an endless roller coaster right now, and we're very aware that there are drops that are waiting for us. But for now, we're enjoying the ride - screaming with our hands up looking out over this fucking terrible theme park called infertility. We've come along way, baby. 

Updates on transfer to come - no news for what's next yet besides Mama needs a glass (or 4) of wine.

The father of my embabies and love of my life celebrating the good news

Wednesday with some pizza and wine

For those who are curious about our egg retrieval numbers, here you go:

Eggs retrieved: 42 (hence while I was feeling so bloated!)

Mature eggs: 28

Fertilized eggs: 23

Blastocysts: 15